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Random quote: I like to know what I'm doin' when I do it And I do what I'm doin' 'cause I don't know what to do When I'm not doin' it
- (Added by: Rexxwood)


Random quotes
UsernameQuoteEditDelete
WallisOf all of the things I lost, I miss my mind the most
YoukilisThe plural of anecdote is not evidence
IJLNever start an arguement with an idiot, he will bring you down to his level then beat you with experience!
yotehunter"Development is the realization of human potential"
Portland JonChopstick are the main reason that the Chinese never invented custard.
FishhawkThe cost of living is dying, everybody pays.
shadowEvery normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag and begin slitting throats
shadowCourage is contagious. When a brave man takes a stand, the spines of others are often stiffened.
shadowYou may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try.
-=edDeath is not the worst of evils...
MulbyWhat's the difference between a pun and a fart? One is a slight shift of whit.
ribbonstoneOutside of a dog, a book is man's best friend....inside a dog, it's too dark to read.
shadowIt is better to fail in originality then to succeed in imitation.
JobenIt is such a quite thing, to fall, but far more terrible is to admit it.
Joben Optimism is having a UPS (uninterruptible power supply) on a computer running Windows95.
JobenSerendipity is looking through a haystack for a needle and finding a farmer's daughter.
Joben"Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum sonatur." Translation: Whatever is said in Latin sounds profound.
JobenAs long as their nail polish is drying, women are practically defenseless.
Gene_SCLIfe is but a revolving door
greyskull"nil illegitimae et carborundum" - don't let the bastards grind you down.
greyskullLife is not a race, you do not win if you finish first.
DanoInTxI think the mistake a lot of us make is thinking the state-appointed shrink is our friend.
DanoInTxIf you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic.
DanoInTxWhether they find a life there or not, I think Jupiter should be called an enemy planet.
DanoInTxThe crows seemed to be calling his name, thought Caw.
DanoInTxIf you're a horse, and someone gets on you, and falls off, and then gets right back on you, I think you should buck him off right away.
DanoInTxBetter not take a dog on the space shuttle, because if he sticks his head out when you're coming home his face might burn up.
DannyboyIf you're traveling at the speed of light, and you turn a light on, does anything happen?
fixLIFE IS GOOD.....THEN IT GETS BETTER.
shadowWhen life get's you down, buy a air rifle.!
Big_BillAll it takes for Evil to succeed, is for Good Men to do Nothing !
geb2112always practice the 5-p's, Proper Planning Prevents Poor Performance
DannyboyMoney isn't the root of all evil, lack of self control is.
crgintxInsanity is just a minority of one!
mark1967If a man says something and there are no women present is he still wrong?
RixtrixIf I had to do it over, I'd be too tired!
plateshooterWords don't teach, life experience does.
Gene_SCAll men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.
Gene_SCThe best way to escape your problem is to solve it.
Gene_SCA tree is known by its fruit. A man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost; he who sows courtesy reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers friends.
Big_BillRemember: No One Ever Got Out of Life, Alive !
RixtrixThere's a place for all of God's creatures; right next to the potatoes and gravy!
SDaleDon't sweat the petty stuff. Just pet the sweaty stuff.
SDaleAnimals generally taste better than they look.
SDaleLignum Vittae - Let Them Come
Big_BillThe Meek shall inherit the Earth, Yes aboult six foot by three foot by six foot of it !
blondelazerSave the whales collect the whole set
Big_BillLove is a Many Splendid Thing, For About Fifteen Minutes
NChrisZNever give a gun to ducks
w9trbNever strive for mediocrity, you just might achieve it.
blondelazerWhy did the chicken cross the road? - To die in the Rain. Alone - Hemingway
3n00nThe courageous taste death once, the coward tastes death many times.
3n00nGet off the fence, before ya get splinters . . .
3n00nI only do what the voices in your head tell me to do ~ just quit being mad that they're talking to me.
JMGDo not try, Just do. Yoda
cccits twice as nice as homemade ice
Elfwizard1975I love animals, They taste good.
r1derbikeIf you're flying at night, and the engine quits, turn on the landing light. If you don't like what you see, turn it off...
leftcoast1No matter how good looking she is someone somewhere is tired of putting up with her S*"T!!!!!
leftcoast1If you can't be good Be good at it.
ragsResentment is like taking poison and hoping the other person dies.
justforfunThe hardest thing in the world to understand is the US income tax system. Albert Einstein
justforfunTwo things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe. Albert Einstein
ribbonstoneJust because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you!
ragsIf the thought of something makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it.
TexHaving been promised nothing, I am disappointed that I have received nothing.
ragsWisdom is the awareness of one's own ignorance
TexLife is hard, harder if you are stupid. - John Wayne
NMCA_RonWhat we need are more people who specialize in the impossible. - Theodore Roethke
CROSMAN_SHOOTERwithout me my gun is useless..without my gun I'm useless
NMCA_RonAll I want is a couple days off. - Huey Lewis
NMCA_RonOnce, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - W.C. Fields
JAVZIf your hobby isn,t costing you a lot of money, then you're not trying hard enough.
HNT5“An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer.”
davee1She settled for a little less to get a little more...and ended up with me.
davee1"Uh...Let's talk about all them guns you been buyin'"
davedMoney may not buy happiness, but it sure makes misery a lot more comfortable!
davee1Hope for the best and plan for the worst.
NMCA_RonOpportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work. - Thomas Edison
NMCA_RonOne man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity, there ain't nothin' can beat teamwork.
eighty8fierogtthink a wise man once said... Don't ask a questions if you know you're not going to like the answer.
TexPain is bearable, until it hurts.
TexThe person who does things that count, doesn't usually count them....
TexDiplomacy is the art of letting someone else get YOUR way....
TexHonk,....if you like peace and quite....
TexThe greatest of all faults, is to be concious of none.....
SplashLive every day as tho it's your last, you'll wakeup one day and it will be.
ragsAlways acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
3n00nPrior to the funeral home visit, we heard ~ "Hey'all watch this ! !"
3n00nIf at first you don't succeed, then chuck it all, go to the forest, and shoot your dinner.
3n00nMemory is like, last I checked . . . uhhmmm ~ what was I saying ? ?
ragsGive a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
NMCA_RonI always take a cooler of beer when I go fishing. If I don't catch a fish, at least I can catch a buzz!
SplashVictoriuos warriors win before ever going to war.
SplashLife is measured in years, Age is measured by your soul.
BakonAirA fool and his money are some party...
eighty8fierogt"The only purpose for a pistol is to fight your way back to the rifle you should have never laid down"
SplashYou can't control the wind, but you can adjust your sails.
SplashIf you can't dazzle them with brilliance,baffle them with bulls**t
sam"Incredulity can only be met with ridicule."
yotehunterDont do drugs, You cant be a Pro Airgun hunter like me if your off doing drugs...
CNC-EngrIt is better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.
NMCA_RonThe quickest way to make a small fortune in airgunning is to start with a large one.
MartinDWhiteWhat we do in life echoes in eternity
Jokers WildWhat is the difference between a HERO and a COWARD?? Nothing ,they are the same . It's what the hero does in that split second that makes him different.
NEARAIRMay the road rise up to meet you and the wind at your back never be your own
NEARAIRnostalgia is not what it used to be
NMCA_RonIf it jams - force it. If it breaks - it needed replacing anyway.
CNC-EngrMeddle not in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and go well with ketchup.
NEARAIRDear me said the man when he wrote to himself
FishhawkIf you work to live....why kill yourself working?
Big_BillA Citizen that Gives up Freedom for Security, Deserves Neither ! ...Ben Franklin
killdawabbitsome see the glass as half full, others as half empty. I see the glass as too big.
IRISH-IRADon't Run With The Big Dogs Unless You Can Tinkle In The Tall Grass Or You Will End Up With A Wet Back
mike milz"DOES THAT RED DOT ON YOUR FOREHEAD MEAN YOU ARE INDIAN?" ASKED ONE RAT TO ANOTHER
moatsarcheryHe who shall so shall he who...
joecuz/akita breeder"INSANITY IS DOING THE SAME THING OVER & EXPECT A DIFFERENT RESULT"
joecuz/akita breederTHERE IS A PLEASURE IN THE PATHLESS WOODS, I LOVE NOT MAN THE LESS BUT NATURE MORE"....LORD BYRON
cf42fwbIF your up to your neck in $%!*....keep ur mouth shut!
BhawannaThe problem with getting old is you don't look good naked anymore...
bentlythe wages of sin are death but after you take taxes out its just kind of a tired feeling
CurioguyLife may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here - we should dance...
CurioguyHere's to a long life and a merry one, a pretty girl and a true one, a quick death and an easy one, a cold beer and another one.
CurioguyIf you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck.
CurioguyDon't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.
CurioguyAmerica is not at war. The U.S. Military is at war. America is at the mall.
CurioguyDiplomacy is the art of saying nice doggie until you can find a rock.
CurioguyThe Second Amendment is not about hunting.
dankI support the right to Arm Bears
RicMicI aim to please, but often miss.
CurioguyBeware the man who only has one gun. HE PROBABLY KNOWS HOW TO USE IT!
CurioguyThe answer to this question will determine whether you are drunk or not: Is Micky Mouse a cat or a dog?
sport71It dosn't matter what others think of us. It's what others think about GOD because of us..
CurioguyPETA stands for People Eating Tasty Animals.
NMCA_RonIf all else fails, beat the problem soundly with a large hammer. At least you will feel better.
RatPatrolExperience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
RatPatrolNever, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
RatPatrolGive a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
RatPatrolDo not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.
NMCA_RonIf you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem.
RedFeatherNever drink water. Fish &*$^ in it. - W.C. Fields
VINNYStupidity should be painful
CurioguyIf we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure.
TCupsI'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.
TCupsAir gunzzzz, air gunzzzzz, air gunzzzzzzzzz
naildiggerDue to budget cuts, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off
naildiggerSecond place is the first loser
naildiggerI suggest a government for the people, by the people
naildiggerThe man who knows everything, can learn nothing.
naildiggerWe look for intelligent life on other planets...when we have yet to find any on this one
naildiggerIf you try and fail, people will laugh at you
naildiggerWell feed me beans, and call me stinker
ikecorleoneThere are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
ikecorleoneWhen in rome, try the veal.
ikecorleone90% of all statistics can be made to say what you want, 50% of the time.
TCupsThe definition of a liberal is a conservative who has been arrested - Thomas Wolf: Bonfire of the Vanities
craigfperrythe guy who said the third time is a charm, was probably a slacker who coudn't get it right the first or second time
craigfperryi'm here to chew bubblegum an kick butt...and i'm all out of bubblegum.
SplashExperience is what you get, when you don't get what you want.
howie1aOnce I thought I was wrong but I was mistaken
derekmcminnSome people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be.
Brod_ManWise men speak because they have something to say, Fools because they have to say something -Plato
TCupsWhy did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the 'possum that it could be done.
SplashA true friend, stabs you in the front
steeneSometimes it is easier to beg forgiveness than to ask permission
Jaymo"Vengeance is fine," sayeth the Lord
mikeiniowaAll air rifles are repeaters, cock and shoot until something breaks
JaymoToo bad coffee doesn't taste as good as it smells.
hodgjyYou're damned if you do. You're damned if you don't. You're really damned if you say, "I do."
TexasShooter72Why are the people rebellious? Because the Government interferes too much, therefore they are rebellious. - Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching
miked6762Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. -Ben Franklin
miked6762I'd rather have a gun and not need it, than need a gun and not have it.
miked6762Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect. -Mark Twain
CurioguyWhen the game is over the king and the pawn go back into the same box. – Italian Proverb
leftcoast1Slingshot broke so I threw a rock at it but painted Predetor on the rock. Shadow 2008
JOHNNY QUESTATF should be a convenience store, not a government agency!! randall
NMCA_Ron"..a true hotrodder wouldn't be content untill he had created a car so violent, so totally sick that the act of dropping the hammer would result in instant death. Anything less results in the need to go faster. " Tony DeFeo
JerrycupIt takes a big dog to weigh a ton.
leftcoast1Every sixty seconds you spend angry, upset or mad, is a full minute of happiness you'll never get back.
Curioguy"The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Einstein
RexxwoodNever light farts in knit pants
RexxwoodI like to know what I'm doin' when I do it And I do what I'm doin' 'cause I don't know what to do When I'm not doin' it
JaymoPeople say I'm apathetic, but I really don't care.
gunner chadThe road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces
gunner chadEveryone's a pacifist between wars. It's like being a vegetarian between meals
craigfperryDANG!!! (Joe Dirt)
mikeiniowaIf this planet didn't suck we would all fall off
miked6762An empty can rattles the loudest.-unknown
CFX MarauderI love Airguns cuz squirrels are to fast to stab..
troyplaThe democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not. -- Thomas Jefferson
troyplaA democracy cannot exist as a permanent form of government. It can only exist until the voters discover that they can vote themselves largess of the public treasury. From that time on the majority always votes for the candidates promising the most benefits from the public treasury, with the results that a democracy always collapses over loose fiscal policy, always followed by a dictatorship. -- Sir Alexander Fraser Tyler
troypla...The rifle is the weapon of democracy. Not for nothing was the revolver called an 'equalizer.' Egalite implies liberte. And always will. Let us hope our weapons are never needed --but do not forget what the common people knew when they demanded the Bill of Rights: An armed citizenry is the first defense, the best defense, and the final defense against tyranny. -- Edward Abbey
JOHNNY QUESTAsk and you shall recieve,,, If Obama's elected
TCupsOne of the most mindless words of our times is "change". As someone has pointed out, there is always change -- except from vending machines. - Thomas Sowell
TCupsInsulating people from reality produces unrealistic people. It doesn't matter whether they are welfare recipients, spoiled rich kids, tenured professors in the ivy league, or federal judges with lifetime appointments. - Thomas Sowell
TCupsIt is amazing how much time and ingenuity people will put into defending some idea that they never bothered to think through at the outset. - Thomas Sowell
TCupsSome people are such masters of the half-truth that it would be a waste of talent for them to lie. - Thomas Sowell
TCupsNo one is more dogmatically insistent on conformity than those who advocate "diversity." - Thomas Sowell
TCupsIt is almost 2009. Do you know where your country is?
TCupsIt used to be said that taxes are the price we pay to live in a civilized society. Today, taxes are the price we pay so that politicians can buy the votes of those who are feeding at the public trough. - Thomas Sowell
TCupsMaturity is not a matter of age. You have matured when you are no longer concerned with showing how clever you are, and you give your full attention to getting the job done right. Many never reach that stage, no matter how old they get. - Thomas Sowell
TCupsNo matter what you say, there are people who will hear only what they want to hear. Many of the heated political controversies of our times can be traced to that simple fact. - Thomas Sowell
TCupsThose who believe that "basic necessities" should belong to people as a matter of right ignore the implication -- that people are to work only for amenities, frivolities, and ego. Will that mean more work or less work? And if less, where are all those "basic necessities" coming from that the government is supposed to hand out? - Thomas Sowell
TCupsThere is something obscene about people holding protest rallies in order to try to keep getting money that someone else worked for. - Thomas Sowell
TCupsWhere there is no [private] property, there is no justice. - John Locke
WBZsDADAny society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both.- Benjamin Franklin
WBZsDADYou better get 'em for they get you son!
WBZsDADI'd rather go home drunk than full!- Uncle Bill
WBZsDADBehold the Lamb of God that takes away the sin of the world- John the Baptist
WBZsDADNow why would I lend money to a loafer?- Augustus Mcrae
WBZsDADHere's to the sunny slopes of long ago- Augustus McCrae
WBZsDADIf I thought I was going to live this long I woulda took better care of myself- Waylon Jennings
WBZsDADI'm not a "Walk Behinder" I'm a "New Note Finder"- Bocephus
WBZsDADAsk not what you can do for your Country but when is my Country going to do something for me?- Barack H. Obama
WBZsDADEntrepreneurs and their small enterprises are responsible for almost all the economic growth in the United States.- Ronald Reagan
WBZsDADThe government is like a baby's alimentary canal, with a happy appetite at one end and no responsibility at the other.- Ronald Reagan
normalI used to wonder why they called 'em old farts. Then I got old.
normalI may look stupid but that doesn't mean that I'm not. -- Rich LIttle doing Richard Nixon. (fits me more often than I'd like)
bcshooterLife can be summed up with one word .............breathe
WBZsDADThat's as handy as a pocket on a shirt!- My Granddaddy
WBZsDADIf you can't do it you can't stay!- My Daddy
Crock PotWhile you sit there killing time.....time is killing you
killdawabbitmany of these are stolen from George Carlin.
CruizerIf you always do what you've always done, You'll always get what you've always gotten.
TCups"A government big enough to give you everything you want is strong enough to take everything you have." Thomas Jefferdon
nutron76Ride the sky
ShadowShotAll Soldiers will fall, but only a warrior will rise and try again.
ShadowShotNever bring a knife to a gun fight.
ShadowShot"A recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run."
HermieI'm an old soul that's young at heart. My body is whatever the calendar says. -Michael Herman
Hermie"Equensu Ocha! Equensu Ocha!" "Let me guess, White Devil White Devil?" "You speak Wachutu?" -Ace Ventura, When Nature Calls
HermiePETA- People for the Eating of Tasty Animals
ZELDAEat to live, dont live to eat.
mackeralboyIf the world is your oyster you better not be allergic to shellfish.
mackeralboyJust because I'm paranoid, it dosen't mean they aren't after me.
mackeralboyEven a blind squirrel finds a nut once in a while.
sonofagun"Beer is God's way of telling us that he loves us"---Benjamin Franklin
billharmon2Some people are like a slinky. Not good for anything. But they bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.
jables61If someone tells a joke in the forest and nobody laughs, was it really a joke?
bcshooterMan blames fate for all other accidents, feels personally responsible when he makes a hole in one
miked6762"A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds." -Emerson
troutchasertroutchaser - jesus love all of us give thank to him .
cubbie99I used to have a little debt and it bothered me a lot; now i have a lot of debt and it bothers me a little.
cubbie99You can never know how much you can do untill you try to do too much
jables61Curiosity may have killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.
ProgunLife at times is painful... that which doesn't kill us tends to make us stronger.
TCupsOne of the most important skills for political success is the ability to make confident assertions of absurdities or lies. -- Thomas Sowell
TCupsDo you want to have to jump through bureaucratic hoops when you are sick? If not, why would you be in favor of government-run medical care? -- Thomas Sowell
TCupsHow can a President of the United States be re-elected in a landslide after four years when unemployment never fell below 15 percent for even one month during his first term? Franklin D. Roosevelt did it by blaming it all on the previous administration. Barack Obama may be able to achieve the same result the same way. -- Thomas Sowell
TCupsOur economic problems worry me much less than our political solutions, which have a far worse track record. -- Thomas Sowell
dragonflysometimes life is like a tonka truck on the interstate
dragonflynever give your hat away you might need it on sunny day
LeadheadThere's no underestimating the stupidity of people in large groups !!
sailorgrizBrain power does not add on teams, it multiplies. Two people on a team is NOT 1+1=2 brains, 1X1=1 brain. Live gets complicated when one or more halfwits are on the team. 1X1/2=1/2.
ZELDAYou know how they say, "You cant keep a good man down". Id like to see him get up after I cut his damn legs off! --PooPoo Broussard
antlernutz62Happiness is a tree full of grackles and a tin full of pellets!
1shotwanderYou miss one hundred percent of the shots you never take." ~ Wayne Gretzky
GilThe man who stands alone stands the tallest
UCTWhether you think you can or think can't, you'er probably right.
UCTIf Man were not supposed to eat animals why are they made of meat?
ShadowShotArtificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity
BentongA person doesn't know what is wrong until he knows he doesn't know it all.
BentongNever hold your farts in, that's when *_*_*_*_*_*ty ideas comes out!
1shotwanderDo not bite at the bait of pleasure, till you know there is no hook beneath it.~Thomas Jefferson
ShadowShotWhen should moral wrongs ever become civlil rights?
tonaka"Science without religion is blind and religion without science is crippled" Albert Einstein
TCups"The word FASCISM has now no meaning except in so far as it signifies "something not desirable". George Orwell, from: "Politics and the English Language" 1946
ec135pDiplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until your sniper gets the range.
bcshooterTarget shooting is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness
bcshooterThe only time my prayers are never answered is target practice
bcshooterMay thy pellet lie in green pastures, and not in your neighbors window frame
JQRIf i disagree with you, it's only because you're wrong.
TCupsWe all want progress, but if you're on the wrong road, progress means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road; in that case, the man who turns back soonest is the most progressive. C. S. Lewis
TCupsYou don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body. C. S. Lewis
TCupsWhat we call Man's power over Nature turns out to be a power exercised by some men over other men with Nature as its instrument. C. S. Lewis
TCupsOf all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron’s cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.” - C. S. Lewis, God in the Dock
TCupsWhen it comes to this [despotism] I should prefer emigrating to some country where they make no pretence of loving liberty -- to Russia, for instance, where despotism can be taken pure, and without the base alloy of hypocracy. Abraham Lincoln
TCupsThe world has never had a good definition of the word liberty, and the American people, just now, are much in want of one. We all declare for liberty; but in using the same word we do not all mean the same thing. With some the word liberty may mean for each man to do as he pleases with himself, and the product of his labor; while with others the same word may mean for some men to do as they please with other men, and the product of other men's labor. Here are two, not only different, but incompatable things, called by the same name---liberty. And it follows that each of the things is, by the respective parties, called by two different and incompatable names---liberty and tyranny. Abraham Lincoln
TCupsHow doth Barack Obama his victims organize and with teleprompted polish, spread Socialist's tired lies! How freely he spends other’s wealth to right the social score, until our nation's bankrupt and freedom is no more. TE Cupples
TCupsTorture Terrorists, Not Taxpayers!
RichieIf it weren't for egos, there wouldn't be idiots.
BrutuzThe Dutch aren't cheap ;-) Gas is expensive :-(
TCups"You can't build a reputaion on what you say you are going to do." - Henry Ford
JQRInsanity - Doing the same thing over and over again while expecting a different result.
gamoluver1in my life theres two important things jesus christ and pellet guns
jeff8541Guns kill people like a spoon made Rosie O'Donnell fat!
tylorwRemember I'm pulling for ya we're all in this together.
tylorwIf the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy
tylorwKeep your stick on the ice
tylorwLet her eat buckwheat
new-beeMen are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped
new-beeWhat you call dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he still aint gonna come!
new-beeEveryone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
new-beeIdeas don't stay in some minds very long because they don't like solitary confinement.
new-bee“Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness
new-bee“I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.” By Groucho Marx
new-bee“God made death so we'd know when to stop.”
new-bee“He who angers you conquers you..........I will NOT be conquered!
new-bee“Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it's better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together"
new-bee“The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keeps out the love.”
DustLife is like a box of chocolates, some people have caramel for brains.
tylorwAre you who you want to be right now?
tylorwWhat brings you to this nape of the woods, neck of the wape; How come you're here?
tylorwI smell varmint poontang. And the only good varmint poontang is dead varmint poontang, I think.
jonnnyboy"Guns don't kill people; Drivers on cell-phones kill people!"
new-beeAs YOU wish........................
tylorwThey don't write em' like that anymore
tylorwI support Enola Gay Rights
goatlike"Stay on target ... Stay on target!" - Gold Five
goatlike"Every day and in every way, I am getting better, and better. " - Former Chief Inspector Dreyfus
Gene_SClife is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
Gene_SCThat one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.
lillysdad621"risat abundat in ore stultorum"
eegarciajrCrazy people don't know they're crazy, just like stupid people don't know they're stupid.
Evo|ve_S|66What is "Sacagawea"?......It's a bag of "Gawea", duh...
1shotwanderGood people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws." ~ Plato
1shotwander"Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe."~H.G. Wells
Evo|ve_S|66Next question I asked, have you dry-fired it? "yes" was the answer I got,....."about three times, and it scared the neighbors cat into the next county
Evo|ve_S|66Never go on a date to the movies.....you cant really get to know someone when you are sitting there not talking.
Evo|ve_S|66Okay, there's good news and bad news.....first, the bad news is that our company is going under and you all are going to be underpaid and or fired.....but the good news is that there's no more bad news.!
Evo|ve_S|66Don't judge a book by its cover......why? Because the title is never usually what the book is about!
RokieAirGunNutDogs and Duct tape both mans best friend.
pindog2000in life people come people go but true friends last forever.
pindog2000what evil you do today might haunt you tommorrow
pindog2000One foot in the light one foot in the dark.
pindog2000three things a man needs Beer,Channellocks&more Beer.
pindog2000A mans greatest downfall is not trusting in himself.
Evo|ve_S|66I made a lot of mistakes in the last couple of days.....my dad's cool with it, but my mom will verbally punch me in the face...
jakelife is like a box of jalapenos, what you do today can burn your a$$ tomorrow
SunshineHindsight is not wisdom; second-guessing is not a strategy.
HutchWhy? Why not?
Evo|ve_S|66Becareful not to hurt a girl's feelings. Because she'll end up hurting you -- either close to dead, dead, or wish you were dead..
Evo|ve_S|66What does marriage have to do with s.ex??
Evo|ve_S|66How does one find out if there are aliens out there and how do we contact them? Well we build a darn good radar scope and intergalactically evesdrop..
Evo|ve_S|66Okay, how much do you think our group has raised this week. Seven hundred?.....nope.....Eight hundred...nope....nine hundred?......nope.....TEN HUNDRED!! Wait....is that even a number?
dk1677I live in my own little world but its OK they know me there
triryRegard your soldiers as your children, and they will follow you into the deepest valleys; look on them as your own beloved sons, and they will stand by you even unto death.
HutchBe who you are and say what you feel,because those who matter don't mind...those who mind don't matter.
ronbeauxThe fight isn't over until the winner says it is.
pindog2000power without perception means nothing.
pindog2000if god made woman from a mans ribs then why are we so different?
pindog20001 googleplex=1 plus an infinate number of zeros wow makes you wonder?
Evo|ve_S|66TootsieRoll: Are these supposed to taste like chocolate!? It's trick or treat, not both. Give me a candy I can use!
KK0605You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take. —Wayne Gretzky
KK0605Everyone is a genius at least once a year. The real geniuses simply have their bright ideas closer together. —Georg Christoph Lichtenberg
KK0605You can do anything, but not everything. —David Allen
KK0605Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away. —Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
KK0605You must be the change you wish to see in the world. —Gandhi
KK0605Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear. —Ambrose Redmoon
KK0605When hungry, eat your rice; when tired, close your eyes. Fools may laugh at me, but wise men will know what I mean. —Lin-Chi
KK0605We are what we repeatedly do; excellence, then, is not an act but a habit. —Aristotle
KK0605A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends. —Baltasar Gracian
KK0605When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President. Now I’m beginning to believe it. —Clarence Darrow
Evo|ve_S|66If the guy was stupid enough to spend $2 million dollars on a car, chances are that he's probably stupid enough to not keep it on the road for long by crashing it in some spectacular fashion...
shadowThere comes a time in life when a man must stand for something but he should never stand against himself.
GilHe who lives by the mouth gets punched in it.
dk1677" I gave my kid a BB gun for christmas, he gave me a sweater with a bull's eye on the back"- Rodney Dangerfield
kiwiIf guns are out lawed , Only outlaws will have guns
kiwiAroplane propellers are to keep the pilot cool , Turn it off & watch him start to sweat.
rh2yOf course, there's no "i" in "team". But there's no "u" in "team", either!
tunaboat“To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target” Ashleigh Briant
Dave THalf of politicians are laywers, the other half are amateur liars - Will rodgers
Dave TYou can't spell "Who cares" without H.R. - Catbert
Dave TIt is forbidden to kill, unless you kill in large enough numbers while draped in the Flag - Voltaire
Dave TMen don't forgive, they forget. Women forgive, they don't forget.
Dave TIgnorance can be cured with knowledge, only Death can cure Stupidity.
Dave TThe definition of a Conservative is a Liberal who's been mugged.
Dave TWe'll use the "Lever Principle" We'll leave her right where she's at. - Red Green
snookmanVegetarian,old Indian word for bad hunter.
GatorGunnerA bulldog can whip a skunk, but is the stink worth it?
USMCSPRINGER"Happiness is a belt-fed weapon
dk1677If you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem
BWANAA reasonable man is seldom angry, an angry man is seldom reasonable
Dave TAdvice - Fools don't want it and the wise don't need it.
ray1377Be careful whose toes you step on today--they may be connected to the BUTT you have to kiss tomorrow!


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