Author Topic: AWNAA  (Read 1827 times)

Offline JOHNNY QUEST

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AWNAA
« on: February 04, 2009, 11:18:51 AM »
Washington, DC (AP)

President Barack Obama and the democrat controlled Congress are
considering sweeping legislation that will provide new benefits for many
Americans: The Americans With No Abilities Act. AWNAA is being hailed as a
major legislative goal by advocates of the millions of Americans who lack
any real skills or ambition.

"Roughly 50 percent of Americans do not possess the competence and drive
necessary to carve out a meaningful role for themselves in society," said
California Senator Barbara Boxer. "We can no longer stand by and allow
People of Inability to be ridiculed and passed over. With this legislation,
employers will no longer be able to grant special favors to a small group
of workers, simply because they have some idea of what they are doing."

In a Capitol Hill press conference, House Majority Leader Nancy Pelosi and
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid pointed to the success of the U.S. Postal
Service, which has a long-standing policy of providing opportunity without
regard to performance. Approximately 74 percent of postal employees lack
any job skills, making this agency the single largest U.S. employer of
Persons of Inability.

Private-sector industries with good records of non-discrimination against
the Inept include retail sales (72%), the airline industry (68%), and home
improvement 'warehouse' stores (65%). At the state government level, the
Department of Motor Vehicles also has an excellent record of hiring Persons
of Inability (63%).

Under The Americans With No Abilities Act, more than 25 million "middleman"
positions will be created, with important-sounding titles but little real
responsibility, thus providing an illusory sense of purpose and performance.

Mandatory non-performance-based raises and promotions will be given so as to
guarantee upward mobility for even the most unremarkable employees.

The legislation provides substantial tax breaks to corporations that promote
a significant number of Persons of Inability into middle-management
positions, and gives a tax credit to small and medium-sized businesses that
agree to hire one clueless worker for every two talented hires.

Finally, the AWNAA contains tough new measures to make it more difficult to
discriminate against the non-abled, banning, for example, discriminatory
interview questions such as, 'Do you have any skills or experience that
relate to this job?'

"As a Non-abled person, I can't be expected to keep up with people who have
something going for them," said Mary Lou Gertz, who lost her position as a
lug-nut twister at the GM plant in Flint, Michigan, due to her inability to
remember "rightey tightey, lefty loosey".

"This new law should be real good for people like me," Gertz added. With
the passage of this bill, Gertz and millions of other untalented citizens
will finally see a light at the end of the tunnel.

Said Senator Dick Durbin (D-IL): "As a Senator with no abilities, I believe
the same privileges that elected officials enjoy ought to be extended to
every American with no abilities. It is our duty as lawmakers to provide
each and every American citizen, regardless of his or her inadequacy, with
some sort of space to take up in this great nation and a good salary for
doing so."

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Offline Crzyfrlss1

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Re: AWNAA
« Reply #1 on: February 04, 2009, 11:47:22 AM »


Don't we already have something like this?  



I think it's called too lazy to learn or work.



Welfare, Section8...???





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Offline Big_Bill

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Re: AWNAA
« Reply #2 on: February 04, 2009, 12:45:05 PM »


HECK GUYS, WE HAVE HAD THIS FOR YEARS !



It's called the Federal Government !!!! Osama received 25% of his votes just because he was clueless !



And now even the Director of the Treasury, can't do his taxes :) Just as many aspiring politicians, and their accountants, can't seem tobe able to read or do their mathematics.



HECK, If any of you have noticed, incompetence seems to always float to the top :)



I guess, COMMON SENCE AIN'T AS COMMON AS WE THUNK !

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Offline shawn67

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Re: AWNAA
« Reply #3 on: February 11, 2009, 03:26:41 AM »
That certainly explains why the postal service always has my mail all screwed up, thanks for clearing that mistery up for me LMAO,
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